If one were to think of someone they appreciate, there is a strong chance that they will end up feeling ‘good’. However, if they were thinking about someone who presses buttons of, for example, they are unlikely to have the same emotional experience.

And when they feel good, there is not much chance of them will blame the other person for how they feel. However, this is not necessarily going to be the case when it comes to the emotional experience they have when they do not feel this way.

Pleasure Seekers

People want to feel good, and as a result of this, they will often go out of their way to experience pleasure. So when a man spends his time around someone who they enjoy being around, they are not going to tell the other person to change their behavior.

This can happen if they were to change, and one no longer felt the same way about them. But in most cases, they are not going to have the need to tell the other person to “stop I feel like.”

On The Other Side

If, on the other hand, one does not feel “good” when they are around someone, they can end up blaming them for how they feel. This can relate to someone they spend a lot of time or it may relate to someone they see on the odd occasion.

How do they feel when they are around them has since got nothing to do with them, and it can then be natural for them to see the other person as the cause. What is happening within them is inappropriate, and there is no need for them to engage in the kind of introspection.


One way for them to get support for their prospects and to prove how they feel has nothing to do with them, is to get support from others. These people can then verify what is happening and tell them that it has nothing to do with them.

As a result of this support, there is then no reason for them to take responsibility for how they feel. But while they can get to be “right”, it is not going to give them a chance to see if they are playing a part in what is happening.

Another Perspective

However, there is always a chance that they will come across someone who responds to them differently. When this happens, they may encourage them to go in and see why they feel as they do.

And if they were to do this, they can begin to understand why they feel as they do when they are about another person. This is not to say that how they feel is “wrong”, but it will give them the opportunity to take responsibility for how they feel.


When someone is in touch with their thoughts and feelings, it will make it easier for them to see why they feel the way they do. If they do not have this connection, their feelings may seem to be the result of it is taking place outside.

It is then not going to be possible for them to see whether it is taking place within them is to play a part in how they feel. Their attention will be on what someone else has said or done.

Two Parts

And while it is important to look at what is happening outside, it is also important to look at it is carried out on the inside. If we look only at what is happening outside, they will end up feeling like a victim.

However, if they only look at what is happening within them and do not reflect what is happening outside, they will also be out of balance. Instead of being in the position that they are to avoid responsibility, they will be in a position where they have to take too much responsibility.


For example: if you feel angry, they could blame the other person or they could take their time to think about why they feel as they do. And instead of telling the other person that they make them feel angry, they say angry when they do or say something.

The first approach is likely to make the other person defensive, and if this happens regularly, they can begin to experience frustration. The person can continue to be there physically, but they can begin to emotionally disconnect from them.

The second method

When they take a different approach, there is less risk that the other party is defense. This is because man is not to blame them for how they feel; they are simply pointing out how they feel when something occurs.

There is then no need for the other person to experience the frustration and it will be easier for them to maintain their emotional connection. To the one to take this approach, they need to be in touch with how they feel and to have an emotional experience.


By taking responsibility for the way they feel like to blame others, it will give them the opportunity to grow and to work through the problems they have with others. Blaming others may allow them to feel better in the short term, but it will not allow them to grow and it is likely to have a negative impact on their relationships.


There one finds it difficult to have an emotional experience, this can be a sign that they have not developed goals and they have emotional structure. By dropping their emotional build, they will begin to develop a sense of self.

They will then be able to see where they begin and end, and where others begin and end. This is something that can occur with the help of a therapist and / or a support group.

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